Random tricks from the mind

Hard to pretend ignoring something...
you knew,
you've seen,
that's there.

It's easier to camouflage...
the surge of emotions running through your veins,
the sudden heating up of your cheeks,
than the tendency to look at you when you are near.

I am never myself before you.

Does this means something that everyone knows,
everyone speaks of,
everyone feels?

Or it's just simply admiring something I can never have?
That I never did have,
yet I wish I had.

Meant to be?
Is there such a thing?
Or is it just a belief?
Should I believe?
Or should I just follow and believe?

I want to believe.
But I can't.
I don't know how to.
Where to start?
I can see the end before it actually begins...
So where to begin?

Soon the world becomes a belief...
even our beliefs will become myths...
Long lasting is a myth...
So...
I can't see its future...
I don't think there is a future...

So why bother believing in it?